oh my wretched little thoughts: 2010

So, let's hear that beautiful name of yours!

Tell me, what do you like most about yourself?

Is there someone that has really influenced your life? Who?

plus a few others like my mother, and others who know who they are.

Come on, everyone loves cartoons! What's your favorite one?

What is the most common misconception with you?

Congrats, you're getting a new car! What color do you choose?

Speaking of pencils, what's your fav. subject in school?

Are you one of those rare people that like to read?

Why is your favorite season YOUR favorite?

You're painting your room. What color do you choose?

Is that color your favorite color?

Do you curse? Be honest!

A month in Cali or New York. Which do you pick?

"My oh my, you're so good looking
Hold yourself together like a pair of bookendsBut I've not tasted all you're cooking
Who are you when I'm not looking

Do you pour a little something on the rocks
Slide down the hallway in your socks
When you undress, do you leave a path
Then SINK TO your nose in a bubble bath

My oh my, you're so good looking
Hold yourself together like a pair of bookends
But I've not tasted all you're cooking
Who are you when I'm not looking

I wanna know, I wanna know, I wanna know

Do you break things when you get mad
Eat a box of chocolate cause you're feeling bad
Do you paint your toes 'cause you bite your nails
And call up mama when all else fails

Who are you when I'm not around
When the door is locked and the shades are down
Do you listen to your music quietly
And when it feels just right ARE YA thinking of me

I wanna know, I wanna know, I wanna know

My oh my, you're so good looking
But who are you when I'm not looking"

these song lyrics have been bouncing around in my head for days now. and it got me thinking. as an empathizer, and a woman, i tend to define myself in how i relate to others. for example, i'd call myself a private preschool teacher. but tha'ts something i do. or i'd say i'm a daughter, or a sister.
who am i when no one else is around?
when it's just me, who am i? when no one else is looking?

let's see if we can figure it out shall we?

even when i'm alone, i'm a nurturer. i cuddle with my pets, and spend too much time worrying over them and others.

i'm a messy person. when there's no one coming over, my house is a pig stye. hands down. it's bad. and i absolutely love it that way.

i'm a reader, a writer, a singer, a dancer. i do these things best when no one else is around.

i'm a prayer. i pray a lot. random prayers, short prayers, long conversations. i don't pray as much as i should, but when i'm alone, i'm a prayer.

i'm a daydreamer. i love to lay down and look out the windows and daydream about story lines, or new poems, my past, or my future, etc. my head is quite frequently in the clouds.

i mess with my peircings. i wiggle them, flick them, twist them, etc. when i'm alone, i'm always messing with them. it's a bad habbit.

i'm a nail biter.

i'm a knuckle cruncher.

i like to veg out and watch silly teen movies.

i'm a painter. when i'm alone, i like to paint. random shit. i'm not good, but it is oh so freaking fun.

well that's pretty much who i am when i'm alone. rachel, as you like it.

update on the life front-
car kicked the bucket day before cmas eve. it is currently being assessed. may have to buy a new one. i'm hoping it's fix-a-ble.
had a WONDERFUL christmas eve with my family. me and mom hung out all day and watched some of our favorite movies. we ate our traditional hourdourves feast in the living room as per forrester family tradition rules, anna came into town and we got to have some sisterly time, we went to St. STephen's UMC candelit service. My favorite thing is to sing the old christmas carols when the sanctuary is lit up by candles.
sadly woke up christmas morning and was sick. felt ok enough to open presents (got a BEAUTIFUL coat, nice blanket, scarf/hat set, pasta strainer, some boxers and many other LOVELY gifts i am so excited about from the family.) then i spent the rest of the day reliving cmas eve dinner (ew). i got dehydrated and my fever was rising so my mom rushed me to the doctor around 11 pm and they gave me a shot in my hip. (ew and owe). i've discovered i'm afraid of shots. silly, since i'm not afraid of peircings or tattoos. weird. anyway i'm fine now. me and mom are gonna frost cmas cookies and eat our cmas dinner meal sometime this week as well as watch White Christmas. Dad is coming down on Wednesday (yayyy!) and we're gonna have our christmas then.
all in all, i'm grateful i had an AWESOME cmas eve, even if cmas day was a little yucky.

i hope all of you had HAPPY HAPPY CHRISTMASES!!!