i'd rather love who i'm becoming, than miss the girl i'm not anymore.

so um... i haven't blogged since november... and my life has taken a few pretty drastic changes. some good, some bad, some amazing, and some just changey changes.

for example:
-my principal asked me to be a mentor teacher next year. :) pretty exciting and quite the compliment. -i was dating someone off and on for about 6 months. we had so much fun together. but it didn't work out.
-my little 2 br apartment 7 miles from my job caught on fire (not my fault). i now live in a much nicer 1 br apartment a little further into tulsa, that i love much more anyway. it has a built-in bookshelf, a brick fire-place, and the biggest bathroom known to man.
-i'm still writing my book, and occasionally the odd poem. it's slow-going, but that's ok.
-i'm working this summer at the old private preschool in jenks for extra cash till school starts again.
-i finished the foster mother process and was about to receive a foster child when i found out...
I'M PREGNANT.
Oh yeah, pregnanty pregnant. :)

So here's the preggers update:
I found out Feb. 5th.
I'm due Oct 8th.
I'm currently almost 25 weeks pregnant, (which is about 6 months and 1 week).
I will hit my 3rd trimester here pretty quick.
I wanted a boy... and i'm getting one :)
He kicks like Beckham especially at night and when kids sit in my lap lol.
He weighed 1 lb. 3 oz at his last ultrasound which is quite a bit more than he's supposed to.
He has incredibly long feet and legs.
At my 2nd ultrasound he refused to show us his gender, now all he wants to show off for the camera is his penis lol.
I've known what his name would be since 13 weeks, but it's an online suprise :)
I call him P, Mr. P and Peanut for now.
I am currently craving pears, chips and salsa, rice crispy treats, pb and jelly and milk. Essentially i have reverted to a child's pallete.
I lost 10 lbs, gained 3 back. I reckon that's about to change real quick.
October cannot come fast enough!

it's been awhile since ive seen the way that candles light your face

it's been awhile since I've been on here.

there's been so many changes to my life in the last 6 months or so that I'm having a hard time keeping my head from spinning off.

twin and i still don't talk. 90% of the time i think that's for the best. 10% of the time, i still miss my best friend.

i finally had the courage to walk away from someone who will never have the courage to walk towards me. after 8 years of friendship, passion, hatred, pain, love, drama, laughter and amazing memories, it was the hardest thing i've ever done. i ended communication with that person, and yet again, it's the loss of the friendship i am already mourning.

i am sensing a pattern dear readers.

i finally have my own apartment again. it's a little 2 bedroom about 7 miles from where I teach. it has a little wood burning fireplace. the cats and i are settled, and ross the pooch visits as often as i can barter him away from my overbearing loving mother.

the 2nd bedroom is all set up for the foster baby i am still fighting DHS to give me. this process is taking much longer than I had anticipated, but the wait will indeed be worth it.

teaching is going amazing. my principal tells me all the time how blessed my school is to have me. i know i'm where i belong and that is an amazing feeling. my kids... they're monsters and angels all at once and i feel i'm the one that's blessed to be near them. 6th graders are definitely the ideal age for me.

so life is a jumble of wonderful and painful things, a balance of sorts i guess. and i'm ok with that. because more often than not, the good outweighs the sad.

<3

change just keeps on turnin, turnin!

oh my lanta, i'm not even sure i can catch it all up with one post.
me and twin...dunzo. didn't work out.
turns out...i'm not cut out for domestic partnerships lol even if they're with a boyfriend.
which is fine. i'm learning more and more this year to BE OK WITH WHO I AM. because i'm pretty great. :)
anyway.
moved out of the apt from hades.
staying on scutor and his fiance's couch...for now.
working on decorating my classroom, then LESSON PLANS. ahhhhh. i'm overwhelmed.
no more preschool! yay!
my goddaughter KK turned 3 this week! where did the time go???

by christmas i would really like to have done or attempted or at least started on these things:
set aside money for a house deposit (rent house, ba preferably, at least 2 br, under $900 preferabl)
set aside money for 1st month's rent and pet deposits
move the horse into a stable in BA.
take all the pets to get updated shots.
take marlow to get neutered and claws taken out.
buy new furniture! (at least nursery furniture for Foster Forrester Baby X, a new couch, kitchen table and chairs, new desk, etc)
become a foster mom!
have finished at least half my book
get rid of my wardrobe slowly over time donating EVERYTHING. i dont' fit in my clothes and hate like 90% of everything i own.
submit at least 10 more poems to various sites to try to get more published.
find a church home!

and a million other things.

things i need to buy for my classroom:
3 bulletin boards
3 bookshelves
2 table cloths
school supplies
fabric for curtains
fabric for giant ugly bulletin boards
6 crates
paper trays
a billion picture and poster frames

things i need to make for my classroom:
bulletin boards
curtains
name poster

things i need for future forrester foster baby x:
a carseat that works comfortably for newborn-1 year.
crib

love love love and kisses to boot. :)

i've been sittin', waitin', wishin'

so much has happenned in the last couple of months.
me && twin turned 23!
he visited gorgeous alaska.
i visited south africa.
here's a lil glimpse:










i got a new cat. his name is Marlow Prince Little Cat, and a fish. his name is Bentley Berkley Benito the Beta.

i got a job teaching 6th grade at broken arrow!
middle school, language arts and pre-ap!!!
there are many things that are amazing about this job,
one of the nerdiest being i can now wear my BA clothes and it's not lame. :)
last day at goddard is july 15th. then i have time off to go to workshops, training, get my classroom set up, start working on lesson plans, yayyy!
expect many blogs about such topics :)

i finally moved out of the ticket booth. my lovely horse Sparky is still staying on the property until I can find her somewhere to board in town. luckilly my landlords don't mind keeping her on for a couple more months.

twin and i are now living in a way too small apartment with some way awesome friends. we're having a good time so far but 4 adults, 1 infant, 4 cats and 1 fish in a 2 bedroom is just not enough room. hopefully we'll be moving out by september or october at the latest. come on teacher salary kick in!!!

twin's up for a chef's job!!! keep your fingers crossed he gets his dream job too!

i'm still working on the book. sloooowly but surely. and writing poetry daily. check out my stuff www.allpoetry.com/evrytimeitrains

spent a lovely weekend at the lakehouse in arkansas. pics soon. happy fourth loves.

i'm looking for a good church home in the tulsa area. any ideas? even just a bible study would be nice.

gnight loves. :)

nursery inspirations && ideas

i'm in the works to be a foster momma as soon as me and Twin move into a rent house (end of june? july? soon!) we haven't found our home yet, but we're looking and we're sure it's just within our grasp!

ive requested under the age of 1 yr for my foster baby, so a nursery is definitely on the to-do list! i really like the idea of a background theme, you can see evidence of it in little touches but it isn't like walking into a jungle or whatev. so my theme is gonna be the sky, mostly stars and moons, with some planets, suns, clouds, birds, etc.

here are the photos that are serving as decorating inspiration:







here are some things i definitely want to buy/make for the nursery:

































coming soon: moving to a preschool classroom at my work! so i will be blogging about learning centers ideas, lesson plans, classroom management for 3 yr olds, how to decorate a classroom from scratch *again* and inspiration photos! get stoked. :)

lets do this again.

1. Last place you were?



2. Place you wish you were right now?



3. last thing you ate?



4. Shoes you are wearing:



5. mountains, beach, or meadow- where would you rather go:



6. Favorite animal:










7. Favorite food:



8. Favorite drink:




9. Hottest celebrity:




10. Favorite book:



11. Favorite movie:



12. what happened this year that made you happy:



14. where you live:



15. favorite candy:



16. A fear:



17. Another fear:



18. how rain makes you feel:



19. love:



20. what you want for your birthday: